{my best way}

What makes a good parent?  I often ask myself this question. And, as usual, a heaping myriad of piggy back questions proceed in a gushing trickle down display once this initial inquiry sinks into my thoughts.   Is it your proximity to them for meeting their needs?  Is it providing them wonderful experiences that heighten their senses and  help them to see the world?  Is providing them a fruit and vegetable at every meal? Is it making them a chore chart and being consistent with tracking their progress on the road to responsibility? Is it teaching them to floss when they are three?  

Do I read enough to them?  Do they watch too much TV?  Did they just hear a cuss word come out of my mouth?  Should I really let him wear that get up out in public?  Do you think I am teaching them kindness?  Am I showing them God's love? How many gifts should they really get at Christmas?  How am I helping them handle and process their feelings?  Am I showing them what healthy looks like?  If he does that one more time, I am going to light him up.  Should I light him up?  

See what I mean?  It is only when I let go of the 'what ifs' my mind is so adept at conjuring up, that my soul finds the Mama I am to be.  I know them.

Eli Garrett is driven.  He is masterful in the art of pretend in a very real sense.  He is kind and overly critical of himself.  He wants things right.  He hesitates at trying new things for fear of imperfection.  I see him stretching out and growing in his confidence more and more each day.  He is highly intuitive.  When just a toddler in the grocery buggy, he made it a point to smile and wave at the elderly in the store.  He senses loneliness in such a keen way.

My Eli is intelligent and a lover of knowledge.  He reads anything he can get his hands on.  He is responsible and yet very scattered.  His mind thinks creatively much like mine.  He is loyal and very decisive.  An inkling of introversion is appearing the older her gets.  He loves his brother and his family like no other.  He is passionate about his convictions and tradition.  He is not afraid to speak up when it comes to what is right. He is very fit and strong.  He is a mastermind at mathematics with such an optimum sense at seeking out answers.  He loves the holidays and celebrations and looking forward to upcoming events.  He likes being punctual and prepared.  Currently, his heart is questioning his salvation.  Questions are being asked about God and His plan for eternity.   Kenny and I are fielding these with hopefully the appropriate answers.  Our intent is to guide Eli not to push.  God knows just when Eli will become His for eternity.

Casey McGill is passion.  He is a feeler and wants all of you invested in him.  He is a marvel with a crowd.  He is noticed and well loved by many.  Casey is a risk taker.  He is very in tune with his surroundings and his body.  He is agile and original.  He wants nothing more than laughter and love.  He is orderly.  Casey has an unbelievable gift at solving problems and forgets nothing.  He is creative and loves to pretend.

Casey is unconcerned with what others see as appropriate.  His outfits are, at times, nothing short of hilarious.  He simply follows his heart and his interests.  He is naturally extroverted.  He often gets caught up in himself and has trouble thinking about others' needs or wants.  I see him at work on looking out and noticing others. At 2 months shy of 6 years old, he loves to compete and to win.  He excels athletically and learns new skills with relative ease.  He loves math, playing games and stories.  God is at work in his life.  He questions God and wants proof that he can see. His prayers are very earnest and intentional for the ones he loves and for finding God around him.  

What makes a good parent?  I don't have a clue.  The histrionic inquiries in the pursuit of the premier parent will never cease I imagine.  And, perhaps that's what makes a good parent.  That continual self-check of just how are you doing.  

No, my boys don't floss their teeth and yes, they have been known to say a cuss word a time or two.  But, I know them.  I see their heart for just what it is and pray for their challenges.  I vow to stand beside them in good and bad.  I will never leave them.  I will never not love them.  I anticipate the road will not always be easy as Mom.  The tough love is already unbearable at times.  But, knowing them for the individual God created them to be, and moving forward in my best way as their Mama each and every day is an honor even when I have to light them up.

.mac :) 

{week 23: my 2 in 52}