{fyi}

When one experiments with a new eye wrinkle cream, results are visible even overnight.

{undesired and allergic}

But, results nonetheless.

Wow.

.mac :(

p.s.  Thought I would throw in this little vanity post regarding the fight against the aging of the eyes as I my last eye post was a bit more profound.  Gotta keep it poppin' around here, you know.

Sluffing Off

{my facial cleanser}

I am addicted to exfoliating.

I'm 34.

No wonder.

.mac :)

Blatant

So I have this blatant protrusion in the dead center of my forehead. Its residing place is about 1/4 inch above the space between my eyes. Dead center. Its monstrosity resembles the sand pile you see above.

Blatantly out there.

Huge.

Mound-like.

I have known of its presence for about 2 weeks now. The heartbeat it has of its own. The tenderness it has evoked, I am no stranger to. It wasn't until this week that I decided to formally introduce myself to this visitor. Kinda sneaky and sideways like, I crept up on it like Eli does here.

Making brief, short stint attempts at shaking hands, this THING and I have. Kinda checking its true whereabouts, circumference, and diameter just for knowing's sake, I have done that too.

And then applying pressure just to see how serious this uninvited guest was about his intentions and the extent of his stay.

And then finally, just out and out squeezing the mammer jammer in hopes of a choke-out struggle victory for my sake.

Alas, the cyst-like zit still lives and thrives as if he and I have signed some symbiotic contractual living agreement.

Zits are a lot like problems in life that you think you can fix, but, in reality, aren't yours for the fixing. The more you push, the more they fester. Ever thought of that?

• A special thanks to Eli Garrett for metaphorically playing the part of me in this post. Son, I know you will be mortified to stumble upon this one day long from now. I apologize in advance to you. And I promise to be a rock of support to you when this awfulness arrives on your doorstep.
• To all locals, I apologize in advance for "my buddy" hanging on in the most prominent of places should you see me. Furthermore, I would also like to apologize for the pitiful job my cake-like concealer is doing to camouflage this aesthetic travesty.

.mac :(

Quick On Her Feet

Setting: My brother's birthday celebration.

Backyard grilling, horseshoe tossin, kids playing...

It was a late night of fun.

So, of course, I brought the kids' jammies to bath it up before loading up to make the 1 1/2 hour trip home.

Plot: After bath, Eli looses it.

Eli: "Mom, my boo-boo! My Scooby band-aid is gone! I had to take it off to get my bath and now I have no band-aid! Aunt Kim, do you have a Scooby band-aid for me?"

Aunt Kim: "Ummm, let's see. {so internally panicking as Mollye Bear is not old enough to even notice that band-aids can perhaps be decorative or thematic...Kim knows she got nothing but skin themed band-aids in the house}

Elapsed time: 2 seconds.

Aunt Kim: "Oh Eli, I have a Make-Your-Own Band-Aid. Would you like to make one for your boo-boo?"

Eli: {totally intrigued, sniffling beginning to break up} "Yes, yes! I want to do that!"

Aunt Kim: {whipping through her Scrapbook supplies cool as a cucumber} How about we design your name?

Eli: "Oh yeah!" {tears immediately evaporating}



Moral of this short story: It appears Aunt Kim is "quick on her feet", don't you think?

Teacher/Mom Extraordinaire, that's her!

.mac :)

Cause I'm there.

Yeah.

I'm there.

My skin is a disaster.

When I say disaster, I mean straight up, "What the heck is going on, people?"

About 4 years ago, the "age freckles" began attacking my face. I even got one of those freckled mustaches. {I blamed this on the back-to-back pregnancies} The crows feet were a given. This was one of mom's signature facial features...and guess who inherited it?

And let's just be brief and say that yeah, I was the girl that after a night of dancing would COMPLETELY pile in my bed with FULL and I do mean FULL make-up in tact and wake up the next day looking like I just put my "face" on. I had a tee-tiny, small, itty-bitty addiction to Revlon Color Stay lip color.

So Cinnamon. My flavor baby.

Yeah, this mama didn't take care of her face AT ALL!!!!

So for my birthday last year, I made a commitment to get on a skin care regimen. Like seriously and consistently.

I have bounced between this and this. These aren't local, hence the shipping and the pre-planning to keep in stock.

I definitely liked the latter of the two, but find myself only wanting like 3 of the products offered in the great-deal-of-a-kit.

I have looked into purchasing just those products, and SHEESH...like $200 buckeroos.

Then there is the money of it all. I am struggling with that much going into MY FACE!! Especially when I know there are other things that this money could be spent on. Don't get me wrong, I feel all healthy and well kept when I use these products. Well kept. My face is well kept.

My face WAS well kept.

But, you know the money, girls. The stinkin' money to attempt to reverse what those evil crooks, Nature and Gravity have up their sleeves. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels.

Thus, the hiatus.

Ummmm. yeah.

Like 3 for the past 3 months.

Zippo.
Zilch.
Notta.

I am currently without even my most drastic of backups: the generic Oil of Olay moisturizer.

And my face, is the pits.

I have zits galore, remember ladies?
My "age freckles" are becoming a mask.
My skin is ULTRA dry.
Wrinkles are looking like permanent creases.
And my foundation...

Lawzy day in the mornin', sisters.

I am stee-rugglin' with this.

Kenny: "Honey, what is going on with your face?"

Me: {Thinking are you seriously asking a woman this question OUT LOUD}
"What do you mean?"

Kenny: "You have clumped up orangy looking spots like around your nose, your upper lip, and on one cheek."

Me: "Really? Great."

Kenny: "We have got to get you something that does not do this to your face. I mean, it looks really bad."

I mean it looks really bad.

That's a husband who knows his choice in words.

But he's totally right. It does.

So for foundation I use MAC Cosemtics {Yes, I began wearing this product simply because of the name.} Studio Fix foundation/powder.

This is what I had on when Kenny gave me the low-low on the orange yo.

For the past 3 days I have been wearing Max Factor pancake stick foundation.

Yes, you just read pancake stick foundation correctly.

Cause I'm there.

I need GOBS of coverage. I need no orangy spots.

I appreciate those of you STILL reading after such a rampage of sorts, but hey...THIS IS MY FACE PEOPLE!!!

My diagnosis:

MAC Studio Fix works great IF I am on a good skin care system exfoliating my ultra dry skin and getting wrinkles lubed nightly.

So, I need help.

Yes, I need some information from you.

I want to know what skin care regimen you follow.
Give me details.
Give me prices.
Give me results.

I am desperate here.

Do I just need to suck it up and be prepared to drop bones for preservation's sake?

Cause I sooooo don't wanna be here...
.mac :)